I think that I will hold for very many years the vision of my six year old, pushing his trolly down the street laden with plastic cups and a huge jug of freshly squeezed lemonade. No shyness there "Lemonade, freshly squeezed lemonade. Only 20p money going to save the dolphins, come and get it, ice cold lemonade!" So proud of him - totally his idea and he managed to sell every drop, raising £3.64 for his favourite charity Adopt a Dolphin. But it was not only money that he raised - he bought smiles to many faces, made me abandon any sense of self consciousness, and quenched the thirst of dozens. Now where did the idea come from? He has always loved making shops and goes to great extremes in creating different ones and in selling anything from ice-cream to clothes to food. This is the first time he has taken an idea, followed it through and actually got something tangible in return. And he loved it. He is totally proud of himself and what he's doing to save the world.
It is the idea of enterprise that interests me and where that somes from - is it inherent or is it learned? Obviously we live in a capitalist society and he sees that at work every day, but so does every other 6 year old. How many actually take things forward? Is this something he has learned from me or is it in his genes? Or his culture or my culture?
A friend kindly spoke to her friend, a child psychologist about my son - "Oh, he's going to be angry" was her standard off pat reply - why? "Because he has been taken out of his culture". Oh that un-thought through argument! How much does a new born know of his culture? Reminds me of the adoptive couple who went to take Russian lessons, "Why do you want to learn Russian?", the teacher asked, to which they replied, "Well, when our baby begins to talk we want to be able to understand what she is saying".
Culture by its very nature is human made, and thus it is a layer that is laid on us as we grow and develop, it is values and beliefs that we confront and embrace. And yet there is something of culture that is carried through the genes and the generations. If there was an animal that I could connect with my son it would be the bear - yes the Russian bear - for his character is that of the bear and of his native Russia. I guess culture is like advertising - only half works but no one knows which half. We don't know. I guess my son will pick and choose that which he wants to embrace, that which he feels most comfortable with, and discard the rest. But as for being angry? Perhaps that is in the psychologist's simplistic text book. Life is a little more complicated and I pray that by adulthood my son has all the tools he needs to deal with his feelings of abandonment, being 'removed' from his culture, his sense of loss and any other psychologial issue. Or perhaps he will be too busy being, like his compatriots, an oligarch.
Monday 24 May 2010
Thursday 13 May 2010
US and Russia come to agreement about Adoptions
 |
 U.S., Russia Reach Deal on Child AdoptionsThe United States and Russia have agreed on key points of a treaty regulating child adoptions, and a final draft will be approved this week, children's ombudsman Pavel Astakhov said. |
Tuesday 11 May 2010
Obama supports US-Russia adoption agreement
Obama supports Russia-US adoption agreement
8.05.2010, 17:05 |
In an interview with Russian television Saturday, President Barack Obama supported proposals for binding rules concerning the adoption of Russian orphans by American families. Russia keeps such adoptions on hold pending a formal Russian-American agreement on the matter. The suspension has been in force since early April when a woman in Tennessee put her 8-year-old Russian-born adoptee on a Moscow flight with a note on him that she was renouncing the adoption. Mr. Obama described the incident as horrible.
Monday 10 May 2010
'Project Prevention'
Fascinating discussion on Radio 4 last week with an update this morning about
'Project Prevention', an organisation in the United States which offers drug users long term contraception, or sterilisation in return for money. They are bringing this model to the UK and quite rightly there has been quite strong response to it.
I am shocked. The whole idea of it smacks of Eugenics. I studied Eugenics during my Masters and there is amble proof that shows that the thinking of the day that one must sterilize the weak, vulnerable and poor for a better society was a direct result of the pathologizing of the Jews and the consequent horrors of the Holocaust. For anyone to deny this link is being naieve. Interesting to point out that the last forced sterilization law was disbanded only in the 1960's and that was in Virginia in the States. Of course here it is 'voluntary' - cohersion, persuasion, coaxing, enticing, do not come into it?? Oh yes there is a money incentive - offering money to a drug addict. It is not a choice as money for drugs is part of the vicious cycle in which these desperate women are caught. Addicts do not think long term, they only want a quick fix and they will do anything to ensure that they get that fix be it stealing or sterilizing.
And then when they get their life sorted out and they wish to start a family - they are denied this their fundemental right as a human being.
BUT and of course it is a very big BUT - what about the children? What about the children born to addicts who cannot look after them? Who neglect, abuse and abandon them? No one wishes a child to come into the world where it will not get its basic needs met. No one wants to see children not being cared for. And there are hundreds and thousands of these children - what happens to them? And there is the rub. They grow up in institutions, foster families, care homes, on the streets. They do not have the chance of a normal life - their's will always be a struggle and they will always be missing something. But should they not exist? Because their life is not perfect does that mean that we should deny them the chance to live?? To breathe, to laugh, to think??
Who is that who thinks that they have to right to deny a child its life?
The social and welfare system could be much better, that there is no doubt. And once that child has come into the world we must take care of him or her. We must give mothers the chance to rehabilitate and we must give children loving families. But we must not give women who are not thinking clearly an enticement of money in exchange for sterilization and we cannot pretend that we are giving them a choice.
'Project Prevention', an organisation in the United States which offers drug users long term contraception, or sterilisation in return for money. They are bringing this model to the UK and quite rightly there has been quite strong response to it.
I am shocked. The whole idea of it smacks of Eugenics. I studied Eugenics during my Masters and there is amble proof that shows that the thinking of the day that one must sterilize the weak, vulnerable and poor for a better society was a direct result of the pathologizing of the Jews and the consequent horrors of the Holocaust. For anyone to deny this link is being naieve. Interesting to point out that the last forced sterilization law was disbanded only in the 1960's and that was in Virginia in the States. Of course here it is 'voluntary' - cohersion, persuasion, coaxing, enticing, do not come into it?? Oh yes there is a money incentive - offering money to a drug addict. It is not a choice as money for drugs is part of the vicious cycle in which these desperate women are caught. Addicts do not think long term, they only want a quick fix and they will do anything to ensure that they get that fix be it stealing or sterilizing.
And then when they get their life sorted out and they wish to start a family - they are denied this their fundemental right as a human being.
BUT and of course it is a very big BUT - what about the children? What about the children born to addicts who cannot look after them? Who neglect, abuse and abandon them? No one wishes a child to come into the world where it will not get its basic needs met. No one wants to see children not being cared for. And there are hundreds and thousands of these children - what happens to them? And there is the rub. They grow up in institutions, foster families, care homes, on the streets. They do not have the chance of a normal life - their's will always be a struggle and they will always be missing something. But should they not exist? Because their life is not perfect does that mean that we should deny them the chance to live?? To breathe, to laugh, to think??
Who is that who thinks that they have to right to deny a child its life?
The social and welfare system could be much better, that there is no doubt. And once that child has come into the world we must take care of him or her. We must give mothers the chance to rehabilitate and we must give children loving families. But we must not give women who are not thinking clearly an enticement of money in exchange for sterilization and we cannot pretend that we are giving them a choice.
Tuesday 4 May 2010
'He is born'
This is the text message that I received on Friday at around 4pm - a great announcement on the birth of my Godson's son.
Such excitement at the arrival of this little boy into the world and into the bosom of this amazing family. His birth clarifies the link that already exists between two families, forming a bond that will create a positive and secure future for him. It is a wonderful feeling to see how safe and how loved this precious child is.
And a sharp contrast to those children who are unfortunate enough to be born into a family who, for what ever reason, are unable to look after them. Children born of mother's who cannot cope, who are not supported, who are too poor to afford even the basics. These children face a life path which is uncertain, vague and precarious. One hopes that there are systems in place which the birth mothers can fall back on, but in some countries these hopes will never be fulfilled. Mothers will become desperate and their children will join the millions of abandoned, abused, neglected others who litter the world today. My Godson's child is blessed and he is fortunate to have a strong and loving family who will support him, nuture him and offer him every opportunity for fulfil his destiny. For a handful of the millions of children without parental care, adoption will give them the opportunity to find a family who will support them, nuture them and give them every opportuntity to fulfil their destinty - in other words give them a chance to lead a normal life and to be part of a stong and loving family.
www.internationaladoptionguide.co.uk
Such excitement at the arrival of this little boy into the world and into the bosom of this amazing family. His birth clarifies the link that already exists between two families, forming a bond that will create a positive and secure future for him. It is a wonderful feeling to see how safe and how loved this precious child is.
And a sharp contrast to those children who are unfortunate enough to be born into a family who, for what ever reason, are unable to look after them. Children born of mother's who cannot cope, who are not supported, who are too poor to afford even the basics. These children face a life path which is uncertain, vague and precarious. One hopes that there are systems in place which the birth mothers can fall back on, but in some countries these hopes will never be fulfilled. Mothers will become desperate and their children will join the millions of abandoned, abused, neglected others who litter the world today. My Godson's child is blessed and he is fortunate to have a strong and loving family who will support him, nuture him and offer him every opportunity for fulfil his destiny. For a handful of the millions of children without parental care, adoption will give them the opportunity to find a family who will support them, nuture them and give them every opportuntity to fulfil their destinty - in other words give them a chance to lead a normal life and to be part of a stong and loving family.
www.internationaladoptionguide.co.uk
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
